So, here are 15 ways you can help her. Don’t try to do them all. Just pick two and start there.
Things to Do for Her More
1. Validate Her More. “Honey, you look pretty in that.” “Baby, you’re doing a great job with the kids.” Let her know when she’s doing a good job. Positive affirmation is always an emotional boost. Also, if she’s more emotional than you, stop telling her to ‘suck it up’. If she’s a ‘feeler’, let her be that.
2. Listen More. Don’t just hear her words…hear her heart. Practice listening to her feelings without offering a resolution. It’s okay to say nothing…and just give her a hug.
3. Communicate More. Men tend to quietly mull over her thoughts to themselves. That’s cool. But when you finish, open up your mouth and share what’s on your mind. Communicate your vision, goals, and plans to her so she can help you make better decisions. And follow-up with her to let her know how everything is going. This will give her comfort because she knows you are on-top of things.
4. Come to Her Rescue More. It always feels good to her if you show that you’re her advocate and that you got her back. Be supportive of their wants, needs, desires, pursuits, goals, and plans. She’ll feel even more secure if she felt protected physically and emotionally, especially from your mother or your baby’s mama.
5. Schedule Alone Time More. Schedule some time were you can focus just on each other. This is the #1 way the make your relationship breakup-proof.
6. Some More Foreplay…Please. Be willing to give some foreplay. Don’t just go for the gusto. And don’t forget about the pre-game foreplay that starts in the morning, lasts throughout the day, which sets up the foreplay that will commence later that night.
7. Do the Little Things More. The little things are important: love notes, hand written cards, unexpected hugs and kisses, flowers, etc. These can serve as pre-game foreplay if you time it right.
8. Be Chivalrous More. Open the door for her. Pull out her chair. Etc… When walking in public, old-school dudes use to make sure their women walked on the inside of the sidewalk closest to the building while they walked on the outside closest to the street. This was a sign of protection. Add that to your repertoire.
TNMCoupleOutsideSunny_feature
Things to Do for Yourself More
9. Plan More. Have a plan and vision for your family. You asked her to be your wife, so it’s your responsibility to come up with a plan for the goals you want your family to accomplish. It’s okay to modify them based on her feedback. But it’s your responsibility to come up with a plan for y’all to discuss.
10. Take the Initiative More. Be first to come up with a plan, or start the conversation. Don’t always wait for her to initiate things. That gets old real quick.
11. Be Consistent More. Inconsistency in your words and actions provides no stability or security for your wife. Do what you say. Stick-to what you commit to do. And stop lying and saying you’ll do something when you know good-and-well, you’re not going to do it.
12. Be Reliable More. Proverbs says reliance on an unfaithful man is like a bad tooth and a lame foot. Translation: you cause constant pain and she can’t put any weight on you. Don’t be that dude.
Things to Do at Home More
13. Help-out Around the House More…Without Being Asked. If you see something that needs to be done, be like Nike and just do it. Also, don’t point out that you did it. That’s so petty and irritating.
14. Help-out with the Kids More. Take one or two things she does with the kids and take them on as your responsibility. This will help her out tremendously.
15. Cook More. I wanted to leave this off because I’m guilty of this. I know my wife would love it if I gave her the night off and cooked for her for a change. I’m putting it on my to-do list.
source: blackand marriedwithkids.com
Things to Do for Her More
1. Validate Her More. “Honey, you look pretty in that.” “Baby, you’re doing a great job with the kids.” Let her know when she’s doing a good job. Positive affirmation is always an emotional boost. Also, if she’s more emotional than you, stop telling her to ‘suck it up’. If she’s a ‘feeler’, let her be that.
2. Listen More. Don’t just hear her words…hear her heart. Practice listening to her feelings without offering a resolution. It’s okay to say nothing…and just give her a hug.
3. Communicate More. Men tend to quietly mull over her thoughts to themselves. That’s cool. But when you finish, open up your mouth and share what’s on your mind. Communicate your vision, goals, and plans to her so she can help you make better decisions. And follow-up with her to let her know how everything is going. This will give her comfort because she knows you are on-top of things.
4. Come to Her Rescue More. It always feels good to her if you show that you’re her advocate and that you got her back. Be supportive of their wants, needs, desires, pursuits, goals, and plans. She’ll feel even more secure if she felt protected physically and emotionally, especially from your mother or your baby’s mama.
5. Schedule Alone Time More. Schedule some time were you can focus just on each other. This is the #1 way the make your relationship breakup-proof.
6. Some More Foreplay…Please. Be willing to give some foreplay. Don’t just go for the gusto. And don’t forget about the pre-game foreplay that starts in the morning, lasts throughout the day, which sets up the foreplay that will commence later that night.
7. Do the Little Things More. The little things are important: love notes, hand written cards, unexpected hugs and kisses, flowers, etc. These can serve as pre-game foreplay if you time it right.
8. Be Chivalrous More. Open the door for her. Pull out her chair. Etc… When walking in public, old-school dudes use to make sure their women walked on the inside of the sidewalk closest to the building while they walked on the outside closest to the street. This was a sign of protection. Add that to your repertoire.
TNMCoupleOutsideSunny_feature
Things to Do for Yourself More
9. Plan More. Have a plan and vision for your family. You asked her to be your wife, so it’s your responsibility to come up with a plan for the goals you want your family to accomplish. It’s okay to modify them based on her feedback. But it’s your responsibility to come up with a plan for y’all to discuss.
10. Take the Initiative More. Be first to come up with a plan, or start the conversation. Don’t always wait for her to initiate things. That gets old real quick.
11. Be Consistent More. Inconsistency in your words and actions provides no stability or security for your wife. Do what you say. Stick-to what you commit to do. And stop lying and saying you’ll do something when you know good-and-well, you’re not going to do it.
12. Be Reliable More. Proverbs says reliance on an unfaithful man is like a bad tooth and a lame foot. Translation: you cause constant pain and she can’t put any weight on you. Don’t be that dude.
Things to Do at Home More
13. Help-out Around the House More…Without Being Asked. If you see something that needs to be done, be like Nike and just do it. Also, don’t point out that you did it. That’s so petty and irritating.
14. Help-out with the Kids More. Take one or two things she does with the kids and take them on as your responsibility. This will help her out tremendously.
15. Cook More. I wanted to leave this off because I’m guilty of this. I know my wife would love it if I gave her the night off and cooked for her for a change. I’m putting it on my to-do list.
source: blackand marriedwithkids.com
